Why yes, that IS a 66-million-year-old proto-primate.
And yes, she’s emotionally distant and incredibly valid.
Our “This Is Me, If U Even Care” bumper sticker features the unsung evolutionary icon: Purgatorius, a crazy little guy from the Paleocene who technically helped invent being a little guy. Now she’s here to emotionally spiral across your bumper - nestled between doodled daisy petals and layered over crushing apathy. It’s scientifically accurate. Emotionally unwell. And spiritually very “you didn’t ask but I overshared anyway.”
Sticker Specs:
- Size: 7.5" x 3.75" - big enough to be seen, small enough to be ignored
- Material: Waterproof & weatherproof vinyl
- Finish: Smooth matte, like the clinical flattening of your dreams
- Usage: Ideal for cars, laptops, notebooks, science fairs, and emotional caves
Perfect For:
- Science gays, sad museum girls, and evolutionary drama queens
- Drivers who peaked in the Paleocene
- Anyone who saw a fossil and whispered, “mood”
- Stickering your trauma directly onto your Subaru
This is early mammal erasure reversal. Stick her loud. Stick her sad. Stick her on and drive into the void.